Roll Over

Every since we moved into the new house Erin has been getting a lot more junk mail. And a different kind of junk mail. When we rented, Erin would get tons of applications for credit cards. She used to take everything out of the envelope, write in black sharpie "Please take me off your mailing list. Thanks, Erin" on the order form, then she shoved everything (including the original envelop) into the prepaid return envelop and dropped it in the mail. Thus, Erin was able to support the Post Office and get her name off the mailing list. Pretty simple, effective, and costly to the junk mailers.

Now Erin is getting a higher class of junk mail. But I would say the most disturbing junk mail that is coming in is all the applications for life insurance. Who knew owning a home was so dangerous? Well, ok I can see why. Higher class junk mail isn't the only new phenomenon of home ownership. I mean, Erin is actually using the fireplace. And if you seen Erin use a fireplace you would know why she is getting so many life insurance applications. (Shhh...don't tell her we are requesting more information to be mailed.)

Anyway, let's get to the point...if there is any. Erin is not sending the junk mail back. Instead she is hoarding all her newspapers and junk mail to use for kindling for her fireplace for next winter. Which means we are starting to get closets full of junk mail.

So to help out with the clutter, I decided to make Erin some newspaper (and junk mail) logs. First I went to the internet to investigate how you should go about making a newspaper log. And I found all these "log rollers" which were super expensive. Not to mention super worthless (or so the reviews said). And then I came across a nice simple instruction video on how to make CHEAP paper logs. And as a extra added bonus, to relieve some stress. So I gathered the supplies and the troops and we were off.

I put Chris in charge of organizing and wetting the papers. I figured with Chris being the oldest should have some good organizational skills that could be put to work. Unfortunately, Chris wanted to read all the junk mail before passing it into the tub.

Ooo..half off toilet paper and pizza!

Once the papers were all wet I got to beat them with a hammer and then roll them on a pipe. I got this job because I have all the muscles of the group. And because I don't trust D.J. with a hammer nor a metal pipe.

Squishy

Once I removed the the log from the pipe I moved it to the drying rack with D.J. (Don't tell Erin I used her cookie drying racks for this.) D.J.'s job was to make sure the logs stayed on the rack to dry. Basically, D.J. kept trying to crawl into the water tub and splash around. So I was hoping I could keep the little sheep on the rack to dry off so that I didn't get yelled at by Erin for bring a wet sheep into the house.

Stay...Stay!

Overall, I think we had a pretty good assemble line going on. Henry Ford would be proud.

Look, no bottle neck!

And when it was all said and done we had 10 logs.

Burn, baby Burn!

Ok, Erin did comment that it took us all day and that it might not have been as efficient as originally hoped. We did only produce one log every hour. But when you consider all the union breaks we had to work in, I thought we did a good job. And we still were able to sleep, watch movies, play on the net, and all the other fun stuff we do on a Saturday at home. I even think Erin washed the dishes.

Now all we have to do is wait for the logs to dry and Winter to come to try it out. Stay tune!

All Tied Up

As you all may have noticed, I don't go on as many adventures as Chris and D.J. do. Some have speculated that it is because Erin doesn't want to take me out. Some have said it is because she doesn't love me as much as the others or because I'm overly plushy. But the truth is I am a home-body and I don't want to go on all those silly adventures. Nope, this sheep is simple.

I like to...well I like to...quilt. Yes I said it. I like quilting. And I'm not going to hide it anymore. The other sheep make fun of my crafty ways but I don't care. I like to post on the blog too and my adventures just happen closer to home. So from now on, get ready for Jesse's Notions (if you didn't get how clever that is look here. Yes you're going to have to learn up on your quilting terms.)

So my first project took a little more time then expected. But hey, it was my first one. So it all started back in February of 2009 when Erin's blue jean blanket that she made way back in middle school started to get really tattered and torn. I decided to make her a new one. And as luck would have it, Erin got invited to go on a quilting retreat (shut it).

So us 3 sheep convinced Erin that we should get to go with (a.k.a. we hid in the back seat until we were on the ferry). When we got to the secret quilter hide out we all got to work. I cut up a ton of jeans into squares and I told Chris and D.J. where to place them. Well...I tried to tell them...but its kind of like herding cats.

Rook to Queen...Check.

Once I got all those squares laid out I started drinking...um I mean sewing up all the squares. It took me a little while but I got the hang of it. You know sewing in a straight line with the sewing machine is harder than it looks. I said it just took a while to figure out the borrowed sewing machine (Erin forgot her foot pedal). Erin said it just meant that I was sobering up. Anyway...I got cracking and that is all that matters.

Vrooom...

It was going splendidly until I had to return the borrowed sewing machine. And then I found out the fossil that Erin owns was broken. Had to send it in and it took THREE MONTHS for them to find a replacement camshaft. So finally we got the sewing machine back and I was back to work. And in no time I got the top all sewn together.

Then next step was to do the quilting. Ok, I decided to tie the quilt. But I ran into another snag. Apparently no one in Washington knows what a quilting tie rack is. So Erin took me to Home Depot where we bought some 2x4s, staple gun, and some industrious C-clamps. O did I forget to tell you that sewing with jeans is like gorilla quilting warfare? Oops... In any case, we had to build a quilting rack from the bottom up. Chris and D.J. "helped" with this. I don't know why I keep asking for their help.

My head hurts all of a sudden.

Hold still...I got it right where I want it.

After a few Advil, bandages and tears we got the quilt rack constructed. And then we got the quilt stretched on the rack. And then those stupid sheep decided to use my lovely quilt as a trampoline. I tell you. They have no respect for what I make.

Look what I can do!

After Chris and D.J. stopped jumping on my blanket I wiped away my tears and put them to work. I must say sometimes it is nice when Erin comes home and starts yelling. At least when she is not yelling at me but those 2 trouble makers.

But in any case, I crawled under the quilt and D.J. and Chris stayed on top and we passed the needle through to X tie the quilt. It was a lot of hard work. but we got it done. I didn't know that quilting was so hard and expensive. I mean the chiropractic bills alone are enough to make you want to just buy a factory made quilt.

Ouch! watch where your stabbing that needle!

So it is summer of 2009 now and by this point I had the quilt top made and the backing tied on. Done right? Wrong. Now comes the worse part. Hand sewing the binding on. I HATE that part. But just as I was getting ready to do it, Erin goes and moves us. So my blanket sat in a box for a few months. And then when Erin FINALLY did unpack it she put it on her bed! I mean how rude! I told her it wasn't done but she just said she was cold and she didn't care.

So comes a full year and I still haven't gotten this blanket made. And then you know what happen? I got sick. Really sick. And Erin tucked me on the couch and let me watch tv all day long. And I got to use the blanket. I took this advantage to sew up the binding and all is done. See?

I made that.

Isn't it perfect?

The blanket didn't last long on the couch with me. No, it is back on Erin's bed. She says it is her favorite. I guess it was worth the work. Nothing beats a nice cozy sheep quilt.